Who knew it could be considered grieving?

A beautiful mama I follow on Instagram shared about a grief that comes when expecting the next child.

She’s expecting her fourth.

Yes, grief.

I never would have thought to put it that way.

But how spot on.

At some point, an expecting mom realizes that her baby will no longer be the baby. And a sadness deepens as that stage draws to a close.

Maybe it’s harder when you’re about to have your second?

I don’t know that yet.

But what I do know is that it’s more than pregnancy hormones. Why every night when my belly was at its largest I would weep while gazing at my son’s sleeping face.

There was an impending sense of loss. Although we were expecting a new addition.

Nighttime was our time.

Work was done. Daddy was busy. So after a bath, little man and I read and told stories while he sat on my lap, sharing the big comfy chair in his room.

Until his sweet body grows limp with rest.

Then I’d gingerly stand up and lay him in his bed, cover him with a blanket. And reluctantly slip out.

My first baby. Not my only baby for much longer.

A growing family is great cause for rejoicing!

But no one talks about the sadness. A loss. The ending of one precious chapter into another. The finality.

Yeah, I felt that.

Tonight I brushed the curls from his forehead and kissed my boy.

Can’t get over how grown up he keeps turning.

His eyes had dropped shut during my made-up story about dolphins. His request. I slipped out carefully, carrying his baby sister who had fallen asleep just a few minutes before he did.

And I felt the grief.

I understood the grief.

And embraced it.

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Follow this beautiful mama. This is the post I’m referring to:

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